Why we use sex toys!

I am constantly trying to find new and interesting topics to write about and one of these days I will actually try to write a whole ton of posts ahead of time (maybe while I’m in Buenos Aires as I’ll have plenty of time to myself and I’m planning on bringing a book or two and my laptop) and work on some visual posts with positions and other NSFW posts that I can’t do at work obviously…

But I absolutely love it when I come across questions from people about sex topics (specifically when men ask them). I came across a gentleman asking about why women use sex toys and why not the real thing. In a pretty public forum he recieved hundreds of answers about why women will use them.

Every woman’s reasoning behind using a sex toy varies. Some do it for health reasons (it can be beneficial to helping increase your frequency of orgasms and some toys can even strengthen your kegels!

Others don’t have “the real thing” available to them. Others like to use them with a partner.  Not all women use toys, I (even though I sell them) am not a big toy user, if I do its typically with a partner because for me that makes sex even more fun than it already is.  Some women like to use toys because its fast and is a way to explore your own body.

 

So what reason’s do you use sex toys? Anything different from the list above?

Taboo Tuesdays!

As many of you know, I’m currently in a graduate program to get my masters in Marriage and Family Therapy to which I plan on pursuing certification through the American Association of Sexual Educators, Councelors and Therapists (AASECT) and become a licensed, certified sex therapist/educator. I’ve always been the one that my friends (and family sometimes) go to for relationship advice. I’d consider myself pretty good at giving advice and try to be uplifting and helpful no matter what the question. Whether or not I’m always greatest at taking my own advice is another story. So a lot of people ask me random questions about sex, relationships etc.

One question I get alot is in regards to threesomes. Should you have one or not, if so what kind…etc etc. My suggestions on threesomes typically stays the same with anyone who asks me about them. Here’s what I’ve got to say on the topic!

You have to ask yourself some questions before you contemplate having a threesome with your partner.

Will you be jealous? I would consider myself a considerably jealous person and I know that I would not be able to enjoy a threesome because I don’t want to share my partner with anyone but me. Threesomes are not for me. If you know you’re jealous and you think that inviting another person into the relationship would cause that jealousy to spark…I’d stay away.

Are you comfortable with your sexuality? You have to be confident and comfortable with your sexuality. Both partners do. You have to be able to be comfortable stepping out side of your sexual comfort zone, if you don’t think your ready don’t do it!

Are you getting pressure from your partner? You shouldn’t feel pressured. This is a big one. If your partner is insistant about having a threesome but you’re still not quite sure if your ready for that then don’t do it. You should be comfortable with it and if you’re not then you won’t enjoy it and in the end it could create tensions within your relationshp. I’m a big advocate of not doing things you don’t like just because your partner wants you to. I do however think that certain things (i.e anal) can be different with each partner and it doesn’t hurt to try it if your comfortable. If you don’t like it, say so and don’t do it again. Your partner shouldn’t want you to do something you don’t like because they like it. You need to find a middle ground and both be comfortable and satisfied.

Are you on the same page as your partner as far as expectations go? Discuss what you both hope to get out of the sexual experience. Is it something you’d like to continue, is it a one time thing to fulfill a fantasy? Be sure to be on the same page so there is no miscommunications, hurt feelings or misunderstandings.

Threesomes are often glamourized on tv and in porn. In real life, there are emotions, expectations and a lot of different factors that go into deciding to have one with your partner. You have to be sure that you’re ready and that your relationships is ready for adding someone else in the mix. If you’re not sure, hold off until you are sure. Until then…find some other ways to add some spice to your relationship!

Science is Truly Amazing! 4 Girls Receive Lab Generated Vaginas

Most of us (women that is) are incredibly lucky. We may forget to appreciate the fact that our bodies are truly amazing and can do things like produce children and have orgasms. But not all women are that lucky. There is a very rare disease that I came across when finding interesting topics to include on The O Guide. Recently Time Magazine published an article about four girls who have received lab generated vaginas. These four girls have a condition called Mayer-Rokitansky-Kuster-Hauser Syndrome.

What is MRKH Syndrome?

According the US National Library of Medicine, MRKH Syndrome is a rare condition in which only females are affected. The condition causes the vagina to be underdeveloped or absent. The women with this condition have normal functioning ovaries and other reproductive development (i.e. normal breast development, pubic hair, normal exterior genitals etc).

Symptoms or ways to detect MRKH Syndrome?

Indicators that a young girl could be affected  by MRKH syndrome include abnormally formed skeletal bones particularly in the spine and other abnormal organs including the kidneys.

There are 1 in 4,500 girls affected by MRKH Syndrome and doctors/researchers are still unsure as to why some individuals are affected by the condition and others are not.  More Research, direct resources and other information regarding MRKH Syndrome can be found HERE.

Lab generated organs are a relatively new way to solve conditions such as MRKH. The four girls who received the lab generated vagina’s had their surgeries somewhere between 2005 and 2008. (Read the full story Here and a more detailed report here and the original study here ) The tissues used to create the vaginas were from each individual girls own cells and muscles and shaped by a biodegradable material that once placed into the body the organ is able to expand, adapt and the biodegradable material is absorbed into the body safely.  According to the doctors, the girls where observed and monitored over 8 years after the surgery was complete and that MRI’s show that the lab generated organs are “similar in makeup and function to native tissue”. The women all report normal desire, arousal, lubrication and sexual function including orgasm.  Unlike other attempts to create reproductive organs out of existing tissue, which has lead to complications 75% of the time in young patients, the lab generated vaginas so far have been extremely successful.

Beyond reproductive organs, lab generated organs proves to be a viable way to replace organs and body parts (like noses, which has been done as well) that individuals were born with out or as a result of genetic disorder or even injury.

Isn’t science amazing!?